Sorry

I am starting off with an apology because I haven't posted in awhile, and now I am starting to get regular readers. Last night I went to a worship thing at my church called Praiz. I have been meaning to go but kept making excuses, well I read the title of the series that they were doing last night and just had to go. It was called "abusive relationships" and a lady from our church was speaking about a past relationship that she had been in, the whole entire time she was speaking I thought for sure she was talking about Ted. All the things she went through I was going through or still am. I couldn't believe it, and how I lost all my friends because they didn't understand why I didn't just leave him, and how I lost touch with my family. For such a long time I felt so alone in this huge world, he even told me that I had to stay with him because I had nowhere else to go. Well now that I realize this thing I have is bad and not good, I am starting to break back out of my shell and talk to people again. After doing this I realize that I have more places to go that he knows. It was a great experience and I am even thinking about going to the battered womens shelter to just attend some meetings, I think it can do me some good. Because now I am even thinking that I am making too much out of this situation and that it really isn't all "that bad". I mean it could be worse, but I know that it will get worse and that I have to leave now before it reaches that point.
On a happier note, I got a call for a second interview with Stark County, I can't wait. I have been praying to God and asking him to give me a chance to get out on my own and for so long I hadn't had that opportunity but now it is coming my way. Today I am going to visit with my Grandma who is in a nursing home in Salem Ohio. I am going with my mom, aunt and Grandma out to lunch and do a little shopping. My grandma has been through so much and I admire her for staying so strong. She is my inspiration most of the time.
I have been going out and filling out applications and interviewing all this week which is why I haven't had the time to post anything. And nothing good, all the part time or even full time jobs I have been applying for (while I wait for a good job too open up) are all easy desk jobs or waitressing jobs and they all have been saying that I am over qualified for the postions... errr that makes me so angry. I am just looking for something to put a little money in my pocket until I get a good job.
I want to leave off with a chorus to a song that has lifted me up and it rocks out.....
If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
We'd see the day when nobody died
And I'm singing
Amen I, I'm alive
Amen I, I'm alive